There is a particular kind of room that looks perfect in photographs. Everything is in the right place. The proportions are considered. The palette is coherent. There is nothing out of order and nothing particularly alive. It is a room that functions as a room and gives you nothing specific in return for being in it.

A show home is not a bad room. It is a room optimised for visual approval rather than for the specific human being who lives in it. And the difference between a show home and a home that is actually yours is not a design principle. It is a decision.

Why homes default to show home

We make choices in our homes that are designed to be defensible rather than personal, and the result is a room that is nobody's in particular. We tend to assemble rooms piece by piece, each piece chosen to work with what is already there, and no single piece chosen to give the room a feeling. For a full exploration of why rooms feel flat even when they look right, read my post on why your home might feel flat even though it looks lovely.

What makes a room actually yours

A room that is yours has things in it that could not belong to anyone else. The most powerful way to make a room feel like yours is through art chosen because something in you responded to it. Art that was made by a specific human being toward a specific feeling and that recognised something in you when you found it.

This is the distinction I explore in my post on the difference between art that decorates and art that holds you. And it is what the collectors in my post on the paintings that found their homes describe when they write to me about what changed.

The practical question

If your room feels more like a show home than your home, ask: what would I put here if I were choosing purely for myself, with no concern for whether a guest would approve? The answer is usually specific, a little bit vulnerable, and closer to the painting you keep going back to online and talking yourself out of buying. For help working out which feeling you need your room to create, read my post on what your home says about how you want to feel.

Where to start

One painting, chosen for feeling rather than coordination, does more to make a room feel like yours than anything else you can do in a single purchase. For help choosing that painting, download my free guide. And if you are unsure which colours and formats to consider, read my posts on abstract wall art for living rooms or art for a calm bedroom depending on where you are starting.

Find the painting that is specifically yours in my collection here. I cannot wait to see you there.